A recent post from Blogging away debt got me thinking about stuff lately like goals, being happy and life in general. I think I used to have this mentality like “If I could only achieve this, I would be happy.” or “ If I made this much money I would be happy,” or “If I could afford this thing I would be happy.” I think a lot of people think of things this way.
Then I started to think about my life in general and realized that I am happy now. Ok sure, I don't make a lot of money right now, and yes I don't know a lot of people in this city and my social life could be a little more exciting. But overall, I am pretty happy.
I have a job (which right now is great just to even have one), I feel somewhat secure, yes our hours have been cut somewhat, and they will be cut more come January but they haven't been cut in half or anything so it hasn't made a big difference yet. I don't make a lot of money but I make the most with what I have. I am able to put away savings for retirement, invest some, save for an emergency all while paying my bills and having some left over to go out and do things, and buy things that I want. Ok, I occasionally get a little carried away and have a little credit card spending spree, but after that happens I usually feel guilty and pay them off as fast as possible.
Lately I have also begun to realize how lucky I am to work with the people I work with. We are all a really good team and we get along really well. We try to get together every few months or so. We had a girls night at my co-workers new house after she moved in, we went to the movies together a few times, and we are having a little Christmas potluck with just our department. My boss has said that it's pretty rare to find a team like us that gets along, and it's not like that at most other pharmacies.
I have also begun to love myself as cheesy as that sounds. They say that you cannot expect to find love until you love yourself first, because why would you expect someone else to love you, if you don't even love yourself? So I am trying to focus on that. I am starting to accept myself and feel more comfortable in my own skin. I think this is party because I have finally found a job I enjoy doing, and that I am good at. I work hard every day and feel good when things are accomplished and this makes me feel better about myself in general. I am also not as critical of my body as I used to be. Yes I am slightly overweight and I should try to exercise more, but when I look in the mirror I am happier with what I see now, than I used to be. I am starting to accept how I look and realize that everyone is beautiful in their own way.
So what was I trying to say? Well I used to sort of think that setting all these goals equals not being happy with myself and my life as it is. When I realized that I am pretty much happy right now, I thought does that mean I no longer have goals, I no longer will strive to achieve more in my life and career? Well I don't think it has to be either way. I've realized it IS possible to be happy with yourself and your life, but still aim higher because I now have the perspective that it doesn't mean I am not happy right now, it just means that achieving these goals may make me happIER. And I think that is a better way of looking at things, dont you?